The Funniest Thing I have seen on the Internet.
Over at the Guardian they occasionally have people list the 10 funniest things they have seen on the Internet. I’m sure we have all seen our fair share, and if I was asked to list my favourites I’d struggle to remember, BUT the video has to be one of my all time favourites. I think I’ve posted it before, but what the hell…
The most disgusting thing is the way the one in red just saunters into the shot, acting all enchanted and enthralled and then simply plonks that glass of wine down on that expensive piano without so much as fetching a fkn coaster first….!
IT’S A DISGRACE…!!!
What are some of your favourites..?
The Gaza Crisis in Pictures
There’s no denying that the unfolding crisis in Gaza is horrific, however in the fog of war it’s worth remembering a few things.
The conflict began on on October 7, when Palestinian terrorist mob Hamas (aka Isis) breached the Israeli border, surrounded thousands of young Israelis attending a music festival and slaughtered 260 of them without a second thought.
In the days that followed, they slaughtered a further 700 children and captured 214 men, women and children as hostages and took them back to Gaza where their wellbeing remains uncertain.
Cleary, Hamas knew there would be some form of retaliation, so to suddenly play the victim in the aftermath of their actions is farcical.
Hamas is a terrorist organisation that enjoys majority support from Palestinians in the Gaza strip.
Israel’s border fence with Gaza
A vast network of tunnels used for smuggling and warfare purposes exists under the Gaza Strip. The underground tunnel network allows Hamas and other militant groups to store and shield weapons, gather and move underground, communicate, train, launch offensive attacks, transport hostages, and retreat without being detected by Israeli authorities.
Israel describes kidnapping Israeli civilians or taking Israeli soldiers hostage as one of the primary goals of tunnel construction. The Wall Street Journal described an attack tunnel inspected by one of its reporters as “designed for launching murder and kidnapping raids”, noting that the “3-mile-long tunnel was reinforced with concrete, lined with telephone wires, and included cabins unnecessary for infiltration operations but useful for holding hostages.
Israel is literally surrounded by Arab countries.
The GREEN is the Arab world. That tiny speck is Israel.
Which nation is really fighting for its survival..?
AFL Grand Final preview!
ToM of Melbourne is back with his annual AFL Grand Final Preview….
Domineering, manipulative, devious and universally loathed. Those that continue to provide support are mindless with their unthinking commitment and zealotry.
Their time is up and, and for a generation, no rational person has wished them success.
Yes, at the very time the wisened, way past his used by date, Rupert Murdoch bows out, the arrogant, overbearing Collingwood Football Club will be thumped by the Brisbane Lions!
Collingwood is characterised by-
* a proven racist history
* supporters with fewer teeth per capita than any other national demographic
* loudmouth backers and leaders such as Eddie McGuire and the dreadful Joffa Corfe
This is a Grand Final that represents a contest between the past the future, between malevolence and decency, between the bourgeoisie and the proletariat.
It’s Brisbane by 40 points!
Massive Blow for Ben Roberts-Smith as judge finds War Crime allegations Substantially True!
Australia’s most decorated soldier Ben Roberts-Smith has lost his defamation case in spectacular style and now faces a massive legal bill as well as prosecution for war crimes as his lucrative career as a public speaker lies in tatters.
Federal Court Justice Anthony Besanko ruled on Thursday that all the claims made by Nine Newspapers that Roberts-Smith insisted were defamatory are either ‘substantially or contextually’ true.
Justice Besanko also found that claims Roberts-Smith ordered a young soldier at the Taliban compound Whiskey 108 to shoot an innocent villager to ‘blood the rookie’ were ‘substantially true’.
Roberts-Smith did not appear in court for the verdict and instead fled to a $500 a night resort in Bali the day before before the verdict was handed down.
Costs will now be awarded against Roberts-Smith as the loser of the trial and he will be asked to pay for the very substantial legal bill of his victorious accusers, Nine Newspapers and Federal Capital Press.
The case has been adjourned until June 29 to allow for a consideration of costs.
IN A QUESTIONABLE CLAIM eerily similar to one he made four years ago that “Melbournians were too scared to go out to restaurants” due to “African gang violence,” Federal Opposition Leader Peter “Boofhead” Dutton (also known as the “Leader of the Leftovers), says that residents in Alice Springs are “too scared” to go out at night due to “lawlessness” and has called the AFP to intervene.
Apparently, he reckons people are “barricading themselves” in their homes at night.
“You can’t have a situation where people have fear and a lot of people have spoken to us about this sort of self imposed curfew where they get home and lock themselves in their homes,’’ he said.
Desperate for a distraction from woeful polling, and a party in bitter freefall over its “Just Vote No” stance on the Federal Government’s forthcoming Indigenous Voice to Parliament referendum, the former cop from Queensland fell to pieces when asked to provide supporting evidence behind his claim that child sex abuse was “rampant” in the community.
A local ABC journalist asked the opposition leader whether claims of “rampant child sexual abuse” were accurate, and why some peak bodies rejected his calls for a royal commission into the rate of abuse.
Dutton: “I mean, with respect, that’s such an ABC question. Do you live locally? I mean, do you speak to people on the street? Do you hear what it is they’re saying to you?”
Reporter: “I live locally.”
Dutton: “You live locally and you don’t believe there’s any problem here?”
Reporter: “No I’m asking you what evidence you have.”
Dutton then responded by saying he had spoken “”extensively”” to social workers, police and others.
He said he was “”unaware”” what bureaucrats and academics believed, and argued the ABC would be abrogating its duty if it ignored the story.
Dutton: “If the ABC and others don’t see fit to report that then frankly I think it reflects more on the ABC than it does on the locals here. And I don’t think you’re doing your job if you’re denying the reality of the circumstances on the ground,” he said.
Reporter: “I’m not denying the reality. I’m asking you what data you’re using to support your claims here.”
Dutton: “I’ve answered that question so if there’s a more sensible one I’d be happy to take it.”
One would expect an individual making wild assertions about “rampant sex abuse” would have the data to back up those claims at their fingertips, particularly if you’re going on national television to broadcast those claims with the intention of gaining some political advantage.
But once again, as he has done so many times before, Dutton proves himself to be a rank amateur. Full of froth and bluster on the surface with an intellect-free zone occupying the space underneath. A complete and utter waste of space.
To quote one of Australia’s most popular State Premiers, he’s not a leader, he’s just a liberal.
Those Russian Beaver Fuckers are Gonna Beaver Fuck Us All!
Say what you will about Vladimir Putin, but he’s a cunt.
A complete and unadulterated one, and a lying one to boot. In these not-so-progressive ‘cancel culture’ times when conservative traditionalists (ie “Tories”) and right wing nut jobs whinge, endlessly it seems, about being “silenced” thanks to the aforementioned so-called “cancel culture” decrying their erstwhile enemy the “woke mob,” or simply those who don’t subscribe to their delusional “victimhood mentality,” they yell from the roof tops of any AM talkback radio show that will have them.
Thankfully, Australasia’s pre-eminent delusional and narcissistic self-satisfied cunt Scott Morrison has shuffled off the scene thanks to being unceremoniously shafted at the last election by a majority of Australians fed up with his cosplay antics and freaky religious beliefs.
But to more pressing things. We’re currently being invaded by aliens and no one – and I mean no one – seems to give a rat’s. How many so-called “balloons” in a myriad of shapes are we going to contend with before someone says enough is enough?
Frankly, I’ve had a guts full, as have others of the Toorak Concerned Citizens’ Association.
You lazy fuckers just sit idly by, while diligent upstanding local residents – like myself, and if I may humbly add, Tom of Melbourne (a lifetime paid-up member of the local Toorak Neighbourhood Watch group, incidentally) – have to to take up the slack due to YOUR resounding apathy.
That’s why WE CAN’T have nice things, and you and your nieces and nephews are getting all up in arms – offended and all the rest of it – because an almond latte decafe flat white now costs $12…! Well, cry me a fucking river.
I was standing outside my local barista (‘Starbucks’ for those in Queensland) the other day, when this young 20 something – millennial or whatever generation we’re talking about these days – rocks up and orders this skinny almond milk decafe latte, and pausing for a moment in disbelief, the barista simply replied “NO.”
That’s what I’m talking about. Enough is e-fucking-nuff. Get fucked.
Hey there you with the sad face
In explosive revelations today, Senator Linda Reynolds – dressed in a fuchsia suit jacket and sporting a fresh blond bob – was sensationally accused in court of attempting to ‘coach’ the defence lawyer, Steven Whybrow, during cross-examination, by sending him text messages during the trial, while she was apparently attending a conference in Rwanda.
Ms Reynolds was called as a witness for the prosecution, yet admitted to texting the defence lawyer during Ms Higgins’ cross-examination on October 6.
She was also grilled over her partner sitting in the back of the courtroom during the trial.
During another heated moment in court, prosecutor Shane Drumgold asked Ms Reynolds whether she had tried to obtain information about Ms Higgins’ trial by seeking to get transcripts of the evidence from defence lawyer Steven Whybrow.
‘Have you sought the transcripts of Ms Higgins in this trial?’ she was asked.
Ms Reynolds said: ‘I was curious to know what had been said but I was advised that it was not appropriate.’
Ms Reynolds then agreed that her partner had been sitting in the back of the courtroom during Ms Higgins’ evidence.
‘My partner has been in court,’ she said.
When asked whether her partner had been reporting back to her, Ms Reynolds said he had not.
‘My lawyer was very clear with him not to discuss it with me.’
Just minutes after she messaged Mr Whybrow asking for the transcripts, she sent another text that read: ‘Also, if you have text messages between Brittany and Nicki, they may be revealing.’ Nicki refers to Nicole Hamar, a witness last week.
Ms Reynolds said: ‘I had previously met with the defence counsel who asked for information relevant to the case and I knew Brittany and Nicki were friends and I thought they might be able to shed some light to the matter.’
Mr Drumgold replied: What’s your motive for attempting to coach the cross-examination?
Ms Reynolds responded: ‘That’ not what I was attempting to do.’
Again, the prosecutor put to her: ‘You’re alerting the defence lawyer two hours into cross-examination. You’re injecting yourself by trying to assist in cross-examination.’
The former defence minister said: ‘I haven’t been through his process before. Both of you have talked to me about my statement.
‘Going through this mentally, I’ve done nothing but for the last 18 months go through all of this, and it seemed appropriate.
Mr Drumgold said: ‘You’re in Rwanda and you’re texting the defence lawyer about what he could cross examine about. You don’t have better things to do in Rwanda?
R: ‘Absolutely I was interested in the case.’
When Mr Drumgold put to Ms Reynolds that she was politically invested in the case in April 2019, Ms Reynolds said: ‘Absolutely not. I categorically reject that assertion.’
Mr Drumgold then put to Ms Reynolds that her ‘dominant concern’ amid Ms Higgins’ allegations was the outcome of the election, which was called for May 18, 2019.
Ms Reynolds told the prosecutor that she ‘categorically rejects’ that concern.
Are we hurtling towards another Global Financial Crisis?
If you’re a follower of all things financial and investment like, you’ll find that amongst economists and business journalists alike there’s a growing number sounding the drumbeat of an impending global financial crisis.
Certainly in the UK, recently appointed PM Liz Truss, quickly went to work proving she is completely out of her depth and knows sweet FA about anything by announcing a mini-budget of slashing taxes that saw the pound collapse to record lows and markets crash in some sort of typical neo-Liberal trickle-down fantasy.
Surpassing the errant stupidity of former PM Boris Johnson would seem like a challenge but not so for Truss who went MIA for days only to reappear later in a series of “local community radio” interviews that saw her parrot pre-prepared talking points in the midst of a complete economic meltdown.
Meanwhile in the US, the Federal Reserve is aggressively hiking interest rates to combat an inflation rate sitting at around 8.5%, while the RBA also shows no signs of slowing down its path of consecutive rate hikes back home.
Rumours abound that investment bank Credit Suisse is on the brink of bankruptcy, with some suggesting it could be the Lehman Brothers of our time and trigger a complete global financial meltdown.
Others suggest, it’s no long a matter of “if” but when.
AFL Grand Final Preview with Tom of Melbourne!
Tom of Melbourne brings us his exclusive take on the Grand Final 2022…!
Has there ever been a more self centred, attention seeking organisation than the British Royal Family?
Now they’re determined to disrupt our annual football festival.
Just when the attention of the entire civilised world is returning its focus to Melbourne, again hosting the AFL Grand Final, Queen Elizabeth dies. And without even considering all the scheduling disruption!
Families had already organised their drinking games for the Brownlow Medal count. But all this had to hastily change when the Royal Family organised the funeral at the very same time.
Dozens of blonde lasses had to reschedule their spray tans and pick up early the double-sided tape to hold their frocks together.
Even the public holiday (to mourn) is the day before our day off to celebrate Australia’s greatest cultural gift to the world!
In the actual game, it is Geelong (representing the landed gentry demographic) versus Sydney (representing the Oxford Street demographic).
Sydney to win by 3 goals!
theguttertrash.com 